i swear to god whatever he has said to me in the past is still ringing like a humongous cathedral bell in my ears.and my heart,gosh..my heart is like constantly looking back,paranoid that someone'll shove a huge axe through it. its funny how that incident unnecessarily rolls in my mind,when probably i have loads of free,useless time at work and im still unable to comprehend,why the fuck in the world did i do that to destroy something so intricate, that not much people will have.and now, often i feel so hollow and inept even though i have just about everything.well,not much money for sure..but almost everything. i hope God'll hex him.hex the defensive,lonely,procrastinating,visible mortal version of karma.

ah...hot tea(me?HOT tea?since now,yes?)mmmm. the time has come, being in the category of a working adult(i guess a 9-5 job defines?especially when you're bored like fuck). nothing close to what i love to do, but at least my boss is constantly trying to cheer up the whole team with small little details like, motivational emails and occasional dinner gathering rather than just shoving to us a lump sum of money and "rightfully" let us do whatever the fuck we want with it.hmm..say,my motivation to work hard, is my boss?=).

oh gosh.when was the last time i felt the cool morning breeze on my bare skin?

Jason Mraz, write songs about the little details in life?make me remember?