challenging religion for a relationship on earth is improper.but then again,so is hurting yourself by bearing the silence which is too loud to bare.

at the end of the day,who the fuck are you kidding?

you'll always be ALONE.

i should have learnt more about Islam so not to fall in love.because at the end of my life,i may not have you.and in other complicated context,i love you and i would want to be with you even in the afterlife.because,"if its meant to be,its meant to be",doesn't even count at all to begin with.call me crazy.am i, and how much do you love your bf/gf/beau/spouse to question yourselves in that manner?

for each Islam individuals, living on earth is just a temporary thing.correct me if i am wrong but,learning on Earth serves no purpose in the afterlife except, if you learn about our religion,deeper.that will help you.Earth just serves to distract you.

here i am typing all these words, and doing nothing about it, with a huge urge to leave everything i have and learn.

i would want to die as a single,lonely,accomplished,holy woman.guide my heart,ya allah..guide me.

i clearly sound confused and depressed,don't i?